What to get her for Xmas

Major issue: guys are clueless when it comes to gift ideas & women are not easy to please.

Let’s face it: the holidays add extra pressure and expectations on a relationship, and since the shopping season has just begun, we might as well start early. You have all the offers on display since October, Black Friday, Xmas sales, special promos, and yet, you don’t know what to get her — this happens every year, right?

It doesn’t matter how much you love her, for how many years you’ve been together, how much you already know about her when it comes to gift buying, you are back to square one: panic mode.

I am doing this piece to help you guys out, but also, your poor ladies that do not want to find a memory stick under their tree once again.

A friend of mine got a set of 12 colored pens and a t-shirt with an ugly camel on it, because: “everybody needs pens and the t-shirt was a dumb cute thing”. The guy that made that reasoning is one of the best men I know, all-time amazing husband and father, so he is one of the good guys: a caring, smart, resourceful engineer. Yet, when it came to surprising his wife, something failed — did not compute. You can see now that I’m doing this for the greater good of women everywhere and for the sake of saving marriages everywhere: happy wife, happy life. There’s no pen in the world that will accomplish that! So let’s start adding things to the buying guide for caring clueless guys and stop the misery related to what to get her for Xmas this year: best gifts for her, below!

Never underestimate the power of a Sephora gift card

This is the easy way to go, but it will be highly appreciated. Moreover, it goes for any budget, big or small. Trust me, we will love to pick something up from there, we always need more makeup, accessories, and cosmetics. You will never go wrong with this. You can even go the extra mile, make a risky move and go to the S store in person. You can do this! Pick something from the sale items (we wait for promotions at Sephora too, so no worries), they have gift packs with products from the same line, that are complementary & go together, spa kits for an indulging experience in the comfort of your home. It will seem like you trying to pamper her and make her feel special. It might seem that we are not into predefined gift packs, but the truth is we like them.

You can ask one of the nice ladies that work there to help you out with some suggestions, but think ahead when doing that. Try reaching out to a girl that reminds you of your bae, similar skin tone, hair color and style. For example, if your girlfriend is a natural beauty, don’t go asking for advice from the one that seems to be wearing all the makeup in the store on her face.

Sexy lingerie

Guys, I’m sorry to ruin your all time fantasy, but this is not what women want. This feels like a present for you, more than it is for us. Sure, it shows passion, lust and the fact that you did not come empty handed on Xmas day, but I don’t know one woman who has sexy garments on her wish list. Not even naughty ones.

Don’t get me wrong, we love buying it for ourselves, for our sexy moments together, for all the surprises we have planned, but we don’t want to see them near our Xmas tree or when opening gifts with our entire family gathered at the table. You can always make this kind of surprises just because it’s Tuesday, it will be put to good use immediately!

It might sound crazy since when we buy it for ourselves it’s fine, but when men think of the same thing they’re objectifying us, yet this is how our minds are connecting the dots. You either go with it or face the crazy women’s tantrums on Christmas Eve.

If you really think she’d go for something like that, just make sure you have a back up gift as well, or a small special something to go along with the sexy item you bought. A tiny token of your appreciation, that has absolutely no hint of sex attached to it, will go a long way, trust me!

Jewelry

Another cliche we love! Just when you thought it’s getting so hard, we made it easier. We will always like more bling, the only catch is getting us something that we actually like and want to wear.

This is a general rule: women give out small hints, always! We talk about things we like, just like you guys, so jewels or bags are just like cars in the female language! We are not even thinking of dropping hints, we are just yapping about what we saw yesterday or what we would like to buy if we only could find it in our size, on sale, in black, etc. Like anything else, pay attention and it will be very easy to pick up on things she likes or wants.

If you don’t have any hints, don’t worry, you’re not screwed. When it comes to accessories, try to look at what she already likes and wears, and try to see if you can find something in the same style. For example, if she only wears gold jewelry, don’t buy something silvery, it will not match, she will lie when opening the present and she’ll act like she likes it. She’ll even wear it right then, on the spot, but it won’t last.

“I have enough earrings” said no women ever, so that is pretty much a safe bet. Big, small, statement, flashy, stylish, we love them all. Bracelets, charms, necklaces, anything goes. If your girl is a business women, stylish, elegant, she might go for more precious, subtle jewels, if she’s more on the creative style, free spirit type of soul, a handmade one of kind pieces would do the trick.

Gadgets or appliances

Hate to break it to you, but we are not generally that into this area, but here’s where you step in: you know your girl best, her habits, her passions.

Most of us are not that excited if you buy us stuff for the kitchen, the house or an expensive gadget that makes our life easier. Yet, there are exceptions.

If your girlfriend is into DIY projects, she’ll be over the moon with a new tool for sanding or a hot glue gun. If she’s into cooking, she’ll love some kitchen swag, if she’s a techie, or a photo guru she’ll surely be into a new gadget. Get her something she needs and that she doesn’t already have, surprise her by buying something she had her eye on for some time now, something she might not get by herself.

If she’s obsessed with fitness, a Fitbit will be her new BFF and you her knight in shining sportswear. If she loves coffee, go for a coffee brewer and you both will enjoy mornings a lot more.

If she’s not into anything like that, you should get her something related to beauty: hair styling tools, skin care devices, massage products. Here is something for inspiration:

When thinking of this specific category, try to make it about her and not the house or house chores, her work or stuff to do. Make sure you buy her a gift, that will make her happy every time she’ll be using it.

Whatever the gadget, make sure it will improve her life, habits, passions, making it a bit easier and fun everyday. It should be about her and not about your love for sandwiches, just saying!

Every woman loves….

PJs — every girl loves pajamas and we can’t ever have enough of them. Fluffy, silly, warm, cozy, silky, sexy, childish, it doesn’t matter. They are so cute and we will turn into a kid when getting one. You can splurge or steal, it doesn’t matter.

Clothes — really good idea, but it might be hard to nail the exact style or size. A voucher is still a good call, but it can be interpreted as not being that personal, not putting in the effort. A good way to avoid that is to add a note to the gift, saying something cute about her and this magical time of the year and how happy you are to share it with her, even though it means you’ll go shopping. Cute silly things work, add “magic” to any line, and we’ll awww in no time.

If you decide to go shopping for her, be smart about that too. You can ask her friends for tips or help, and try not to go overboard and buy a $2000 designer silk scarf. That will not make her burst out with joy.

Perfume — all time fav with a catch: picking something she likes. Tip: sniff your way into a great choice by checking out what she already loves. Crazy thing about me: all my perfumes are built on the same note, so they all feel similar. Maybe getting something in the same area will do the trick. You can’t wrong with a fresh subtle scent either, a day to day, pret a porter perfume. If you want to get her something new, you could take the experts’ advice and go for a special winter fragrance. Check it out here: http://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/beauty/news/g5099/best-perfume-for-fall-into-winter/.

Book, bags & bling

This triple b might seem like a threat but it’s not more difficult than above.

Books: if she’s an avid reader, this is a no-brainer, right? She’s probably telling you about what she’s into these days, so go for that specific category, and you’ll be fine. Better yet, go for a home run: get her a kindle!

Bags: the myth that we are all dreaming of a designer bag is true, but we would take a cute backpack or a tote, any day.

Bling: I know I’ve already covered this part, but just wanted to say it one more time.

Romance

We are all expecting some romance during the holidays, yet we know what that translates into for me: sexy Xmas elf costume. Not what we had in mind!

A personal note added to any gift will make it more special. A Xmas morning note on the pillow, hiding our present and giving out clues is cute. We want to believe in Christmas magic, so just play along. It doesn’t have to be huge.

For example, if your girl is into movies, get her a popcorn machine and a stack of old movies, chick flicks or whatever she’s into a plan a movie night in. Get a personal couple journal, like this one here and make that part of your new tradition together. Setting up a new tradition for the both of you gives a nice twist to anything you get her, right?

You can add a bit of romance to anything you buy her, it doesn’t really matter if it’s silly. Take your own special couple language and add that to the message on the gift card.

Shiny & bright? More like personal & creative

That is the best advice anyone can give you when it comes to presents and what to get her for Xmas. Be thoughtful and remember everything you already know about the person, get her something she will actually use & mix it up with a bit of magic dust. I sounds like a Hallmark card, but it works. Listen to those hints, look for signs and get a gift earlier this year, don’t just wait for stocks to be over.

You can even ask for what she wants, ain’t no shame in that, but for an extra Awww be sure to include something that you thought of by yourself under the tree, a small special something that will make the difference.

Gals, if you want something special this year, leave a comment below and let everybody know about your wishes, so we can help the poor fellows more this year. Guys, if you already have found the perfect gifts, share the info and lend a hand to others as well. I’ll be waiting for suggestions while making my own list for Santa.

Originally published at madame.exposed on November 21, 2017.